Class of 2020 Blog

Posts from the Johns Hopkins Class of 2020

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Cold Feet

I spent the latter half of my time in high school dreaming of the time when I would finally get to be a COLLEGE STUDENT. Nope, not college student, but COLLEGE STUDENT, because it was THAT exciting to me of a concept.

After I got accepted early decision to Hopkins, I scavenged the Internet for any and all info on what college life at Hopkins would be like. (For some ODD reason, I actually never found Hopkins Interactive, which baffles my mind.) I read through threads and threads of conversations about Hopkins on tons of different forums online. I flipped through the booklets that got mailed to admitted students over and over again. I stalked the Hopkins Instagram and Facebook page and promptly added “JHU 2020” to my own Instagram bio and added “Will start studying at Johns Hopkins August 2016” to my Facebook timeline. Even though my senior year wasn’t over just yet, I just felt like I was so ready to start being a Hopkins student already.

Then, came summer. The excitement that I had harbored for so long about college started to dwindle. I got really comfortable not having to study or worry about tests. Before senior year had ended, I told myself that I was going to use this summer as time to do nothing besides have fun. I had a tutoring job that I loved, but besides that I accomplished exactly what I wanted to; I had so much fun every single day. Because my best friends and boyfriend at the time all were headed to different colleges than me, I wanted to maximize my time with them.

So when it was finally time to leave the comfortable haven that was my home, I was so not ready. I didn’t even pack until the very morning of move-in day, so I ended up leaving a lot of the things I needed at home because of the haste. It just all happened so fast. I didn’t pause for a second to prepare myself mentally for college. So the first few weeks of school just kind of occurred in a blur.

Cold feet is a fickle thing. You think it won’t happen to you or that your excitement will mask any kind of fear or anxiety, but when it hits, it’s hard to control. I had cold feet about going to college even halfway through first semester.

When I finally had time to fully reflect on everything that happened first semester during winter break, I told myself I would not allow myself to be so unprepared for second semester. I got an internship during winter break so I could maintain the routine of working hard. I packed earlier. I planned out my goals for second semester and how I would go about achieving them.

Now, I finally feel ready to be a college student and I am so very excited for everything that spring semester has to offer!

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