If I’ve learned anything as a college senior, it’s that sometimes—not always, but sometimes—”the plan” likes to veer off 180˚ and leave you in the dust wondering what the point of planning ever was. Of course it’s productive to set aspirations and to envision various means to get there, but upon recently finding myself with overly specific expectations, when things started to go awry I felt lost and, frankly, like a bit of a failure.
Fast-forward through much reflection and a much-needed winter break back in Saint Louis, and I’ve come to see that, while planning ahead is one way of doing things, it’s certainly not the sole means to an end. Since then, I’ve embraced uncertainty—when else in your life can you afford to leave so much up to the unknown?—and I’ve learned how to find peace without a plan.
In this same spirit, it almost feels fruitless to discuss my hopes for my final semester at Hopkins. Instead of assigning an assortment of expectations onto these next few months, I’d rather focus on what I do know and let what’s uncertain figure itself out as time goes on. I’m hoping that by spending my time and effort focusing on things within my control, I can enjoy the moment without stressing about what’s next (because, admittedly, there’s a lot on the horizon of a soon-to-be-graduating-senior that merits some worrying).
The only issue with this newfound approach is that I typically write a blog about what I anticipate before each coming semester and chronicle my thoughts and feelings about what’s to come. Since this doesn’t fit in with my growing skepticism of setting grand expectations, I’ve instead crafted a list of undeniable facts about my final months at Hopkins to still give you a matter-of-fact glance into the good life.
1. I’ll be finishing off the year in my favorite rowhome in Waverly, also known as home. It has lots of space, might be haunted, and I’m currently trying to revive my beloved plants after abandoning them for winter break.
2. I’ll finish off my yearlong internship at The Contemporary. These are some things happening at TC:2a. Letha Wilson artist talk on January 29, co-hosted with ICA Baltimore 2b. The opening of Bubble Over Green, a solo project by video artist Victoria Fu, in the Kagro Building on February 21 2c. The release of the second issue of Scroll, an intern-produced publication, in March
3. I’m taking sixteen credits. These include:3a. The second half of my Honors Thesis exploring spectatorship in the work of contemporary French artist Pierre Huyghe 3b. A Senior Capstone through Museums & Society, which will take the form of an upcoming exhibition here in Baltimore 3c. The Business of Museums, an online graduate course through the MA in Museum Studies program 3d. An introduction to film theory, aptly named Introduction to Film Theory 3e. The ‘Long Sixties’ in Europe, an art history class on the multitude of movements that both bookend and span the 1960s
4. I’ll continue writing blogs for Hopkins Interactive.4a. I will inevitably and nostalgically read through all of my old posts during the last few days of classes
5. I will spend too much money at:5a. Dooby’s Coffee (not on coffee, but on sandwiches and snacks) 5b. Charles Village Pub 5c. The Bun Shop 5d. The pizza place next to The Bun Shop 5e. Iggie’s (for actual, good pizza) 5f. The Crown (this has already happened—help)
5 cont. It’s good to acknowledge this upfront.
6. I will listen to each of these albums on repeat until I start to hate myself and move on to the next one:6a. Lushlife, Plateau Vision 6b. Kanye West, Graduation (very fitting) 6c. Azealia Banks, Broke With Expensive Taste 6d. Black Moon, Enta Da Stage 6e. Jacques Brel, Les Bourgeois
7. I will go on a rad Spring Break trip with rad people.
8. I will spend an exorbitant amount of time in Gilman which is very much okay with me.
9. I will reach new heights vis-à-vis the corndogs at Spring Fair.
10. I will guilt people into doing fun/weird things with the useful adage “…but it’s senior year!”
11. I’ll figure out my next steps when the timing’s right, graduate from college, and go from there—and that’s a-ok by me.