Some people are morning people. They can get up early, get a head start on their day, and be genuinely happy about it.

I am not a morning person. Mornings and I are like Garfield and Mondays. Now even though I hate mornings, I do have a morning routine that I’ve managed to get down to a tee. This routine maximizes sleep while minimizing work to get to class on time. My first class on most days is at 10 AM. Here’s how the hours leading up to that go:

7:45 AM: Set an alarm to wake me up.

Now hold on, hear me out. We can all agree that the best sleep is the turning off the alarm and going back to sleep sleep, right? Well, I’ve figured out that if I set an alarm at 7:45, it’ll wake me up late enough that I could theoretically get up and get started on my day. Instead, I shut that guy off and get to fall blissfully back into sleep in the comfort of my bed for another hour and a half. Such as a satisfying feeling, trust me.

9:00: Set my first alarm to actually get me up.

I’m also one of those people that needs like 8 alarms to get out of bed, so I’m just going to fast forward through 9:05, 9:15, 9:20: 9:25, and 9:30.

9:35: Shut off the seventh alarm and look at the note on it that says “Get up now or you won’t get to class.” and actually drag myself out of bed. I generally tend to scan the room for what clothes are easily accessible and base my wardrobe on that.

9:40: At this point I need to hit the routine on clockwork otherwise I will be late to class. By 9:40 I’m in the bathroom brushing my teeth and cleaning my face up.

9:45: I can’t tell you how much time I’ve lost figuring out if my shoes will match with the rest of my clothes. So let’s toss 3 minutes to that.

9:48: Be dressed and frantically struggling to get out of the room by 9:50.

9:49: Toss all my stuff into my backpack, grab my earphones, and spend 10 seconds figuring out what song I want to listen to.

9:49:10: Head to the door but check the rule of three* before leaving.

9:50: Out the door and headed to the elevator, convinced beyond a doubt that this is the day I’m going to be late to class.

9:58: Make it to class, grab a seat, and get ready for lecture to start.

Repeat this for 14 weeks, and that’s my semester!

*Wallet, keys, phone. I’m 99% sure all guys do this by tapping their three pockets and making sure the appropriate object is there.