Simply Serendipitous

I’m done with college.  I guess it’s not official yet, but I have well over my required 120 credits and I finished my public health graduate classes requirement, so I feel pretty safe calling it done.  I keep trying to think about what these next few months will be like – I’ll be working full-time in Admissions and hanging around like I’m still a normal student – but whenever I try to picture it, I realize that this whole “being done” thing hasn’t fully set in.

Don’t get my wrong, I have surely celebrated and made sure to obnoxiously throw in references to being done with college. But I think I’m just kind of shocked that I could actually, really have finished college.  We all know I’m no physicist, but even I know there’s some funny relativity thing going on with time – how can it simultaneously feel like I just started at Hopkins but also feel like it’s been forever since my freshman year?

Obligatory tourist photo during my trip to NYC after finishing college.

The best I can come up with is that I’ve changed substantially since that day in late August when my parents left me in Baltimore.  Without getting all sappy and nostalgic, suffice it to say that my college education was more comprehensive than I could have imagined.

So, what does one do upon finishing their formal education at Johns Hopkins?  Well, for starters I ran off to New York, almost immediately after getting out of my last class.  (My graduate classes continued through December 17, though I finished all of my finals on the 16^th).  I spent the weekend doing touristy things and getting in the holiday spirit before making my way south for the rest of break.  Since being home, I’ve completely thrown off my internal alarm clock, stocked up on bulk purchases (I’ll be driving my car back to Baltimore; hugely convenient), and actually started going to the gym.  I’ve done a little bit of my admissions work, but I’m still pretty slow at it, so it takes a long time to get a little done.

Basically, I’ve been doing everything I would do if I were to return as a normal student next semester.  I’ve done all of the typical post-semester unwinding things, then all of the typical pre-semester preparation things.   My fingers are crossed for a nice, smooth transition since I’ll start working during intersession, but I’ll surely keep you all posted.  In the mean time, I’m going to continue enjoying my post-semester unwinding and I’ll write soon with my big plans for the new year.

at least the farmer's market a few blocks away makes it easy to eat well!

This summer, in addition to my wonderfully flexible work schedule and three-times-per-week class, I’ve taken it upon myself to start behaving a little bit more like a grown-up.  This has included having my own internet installed (I almost made it a full year sharing with a friend/picking up the signal from Charles Commons across the alley!), limiting the number of meals out (which means learning to cook), and picking up various hobbies typically popular within our grandparents’ demographic (I already know how to knit, so I taught myself to crochet, just for kicks).

Perhaps most notable of these grown-up activities is deciding what I’m going to do with myself once I no longer have the “but I’m a college student!” excuse.  I currently have five (yes, five) lists I’ve made of the law schools I’m going to apply to, and I’m working on my third personal statement (they’re all completely different – I can’t bring myself to edit them without rewriting it entirely from scratch).  All of this may lead you to a very astute observation:  I don’t seem to be very good at this grown-up thing.  I make these silly little attempts at it, but in the end, I just have another personal statement (or a whole bunch of crocheted coasters, or a very weird meal, as the case may be).

if only it was so simple!

The truth is, I’m kind of scared of this whole growing up thing.  When I was getting ready to apply to college, I had a pretty good idea of where I’d end up.  If not Hopkins, I knew I’d be at a state school, so I’d either be in Baltimore or North Carolina.  Sure, there was some uncertainty, but it wasn’t so overwhelming.  Now, however, I have about ten different places I could be, and about twenty different schools I could be attending.   That doesn’t even include all of the potential back-up plans that don’t involve law school.

I’ve come to realize that the reason I’m not finishing my personal statements is because I’m overwhelmed by the possibilities that it means.  Once I have my personal statement done (or at least something resembling a personal statement done), it’s like I’ve officially started my application process.  It was so much easier to be excited when it wasn’t coming up so fast!

Now that I’ve spilled my soul to the world, I’m hoping it will at least have been some cathartic experience that’ll help me finish one draft of a personal statement.  Or consolidate a couple of my lists of schools.  Or something.  Maybe I’ll be inspired.

At any rate, to those of you who are starting at Hopkins in a few weeks or others who are thinking about applying in a few months (or years), the scary uncertainties are both completely normal and not limited to the college transition.  As much as I love having things planned and knowing exactly what I’m doing with myself, the uncertainty is one of the most exciting things about moving from one phase to the next.  After all, plans aren’t really all they’re cracked up to be (…for those of you who have read a certain recent entry, you’ll know I’m an expert on these  matters).

Late last fall, I decided that I wanted to work in Washington D.C.  I tried to craft a spring schedule that would allow for a Washington internship, but it just wasn’t working when I took my LSAT prep into account.  So, I vowed that I’d have one in the summer.  I started searching in November, knowing that some of the positions I was interested in were highly competitive and required lengthy application processes, including security clearances.  By the time spring break arrived, I had applied to several positions and more or less stopped my search process as my LSAT class started up.  My focus shifted entirely and I couldn’t really think too much about my summer when I had this gigantic test to get through first.

Long story short, my entire internship search yielded one interview request.  I was disappointed that I wasn’t having the results I’d hoped for, but as the spring semester wound down, I realized that it was probably for the best.  This past spring semester, as it turns out, I piled on too much in order to do any of it very well.  The summer plans evolved accordingly, allowing me to take some time to just hang out and recover from an exhausting semester, with my Macro class starting July 7—exactly one month after my LSAT.  I also started work (in admissions) that same day, so for that month, I truly had no responsibilities.

So, what does one do with a month off, you ask?  Well, I watched the entire series of The Wire (such a great show), visited my family and the new house “down east” (on South River, outside of Beaufort, but it’s kind of in the middle of nowhere.  “Down east” is a North Carolina expression that roughly translates to “it’s legitimately North Carolinian”).   I even cleaned up my room at home a little bit, much to the surprise of my parents.  When I returned to Baltimore, I immediately went to DC for the Law School Forum, which is basically like a college fair, where I picked up all the pretty little flyers and viewbooks and put my name down to get TONS of emails.  I also started knitting again, most notably an elephant.

the docks in Beaufort and my knitted elephant

After that, it was a relaxing couple of weeks to hang out in Baltimore (and see Toy Story 3) and hang out with friends.  Next up was a trip to NYC for July 4, which included all sorts of sightseeing, since my experience with the city had amounted to three days/two nights for an intersession class and one evening for an admitted student reception.  I went to a Yankees game (don’t worry, I still love my O’s) and was kind of starstruck by the whole experience.  It was a fantastic trip and my return to Baltimore brought the beginning of class and work.

Yankee Stadium and Central Park

So, my summer didn’t turn out the way I had hoped it would, but I’m starting to learn that big plans of mine rarely turn out as expected.  It’s been a wonderful summer so far and I’m looking forward to the rest of it!

What a semester it’s been, and it’s hard to believe that it’s already over.   My last final was Sunday morning (rough, huh? It’s because of the snow week we had back in February) and I’m just starting to appreciate being done with classes.  I’ve taken a couple of days to decompress, watch movies, and get out in Baltimore a bit, but it’s turning into LSAT time.

The test is in less than three weeks (eek!) and my focus had shifted during finals.  But I’m getting closer to my goal, at least based on the practice tests, so I’m hoping a few weeks of solid studying will pull me up to where I want to be.  While I’m focused on that, however, I’ve kind of let the summer planning slip to the side and I’m still not sure what I’ll be doing this summer on a daily basis (of course, I have my list of things I want to do in general, but I don’t have a job or internship).  I kind of take this one-thing-at-a-time approach: first finals, then LSAT, and then summer things.  We’ll see how it goes.

I do have to say, being at Hopkins in between finals and the first session of summer school is quite nice.  I think all of the underclassmen have moved out by now and it’s pretty quiet in Charles Village, but it’s a perfect setting for the decompressing post-finals and focusing ahead on the LSAT—and best of all, I can actually get a table at Carma’s (www.carmascafe.com).  I’m also trying to squeeze in as much time as possible with everyone before we all go our separate ways for the summer, so it’s a fun couple of weeks (you know, aside from the days spent studying).

All I can say is that I’m looking forward to June 8—the day after the LSAT.  Once I get past it, I’ll be able to start really enjoying my summer and looking forward to my last semester as an undergrad (crazy, right?).  Until then, it’s back to the logic games, reading comp, and arguments.  Almost done!

Well, finals just started today and I’m already counting down until next week when it’s all over.  I have two final papers and four exams, so there’s certainly a good amount of things I could/should be doing at any given time.  In other words, it’s not a particularly pleasant week.

However, I’m getting through it by looking forward to this summer and have already made my summer to-do list.

1. Study for the LSAT.  I have a couple of weeks between finals and the big test date, so I’ll be doing some serious studying to make up for the weeks I did more regular school work than LSAT classwork.
2. TAKE THE LSAT.  Thankfully, it’s on June 7, so once it’s over, I’m free from the hours and hours of studying.
3. Go home.  I haven’t been home since winter break, and my parents recently got a place at the coast, so it’ll make for a nice break.
4. Start the law school admissions process.  Once I get my LSAT score at the end of June, it’ll be time to realistically assess myself and decide where to apply.
5. Decide what to do during the days.  I haven’t found an internship or anything like that, so I’m going to have to figure out what to do with myself.  As of now, doing nothing sounds pretty appealing, but it’s hard to objectively assess these things on four hours of sleep.
6. Travel.  I don’t really care where, but I’d like to go somewhere this summer.  Maybe law school visits will satisfy this?
7. Write a personal statement.  This is the biggest part of law school applications, and it’s incredibly vague.  I want to work on it all summer and hopefully take some of the burden off in the fall when I’m back to classes.
8. Learn to cook.  I remember this was a big goal of mine last fall when I first moved into my apartment, but something about classes, work, and studying kind of put that on the backburner (ha…ha).
9. Read for fun!  I haven’t read anything for my personal enjoyment since Harry Potter, most likely.  I don’t even remember.
10. Work on the IMDB Top 250.  Oh, Netflix.
11. Knit something.  I also love knitting but I’ve never finished a project.  I have a ¾-finished sock in my closet; maybe I’ll finish it off and even consider making the other of the pair.

As you can see, I don’t have anything too eventful planned, but in the aggregate, things like applying to law school and visiting home will make for a somewhat busy (and fun) summer.

In the meantime, it’s back to studying!  I wouldn’t want to add “retaking a class” to that list.

I’m writing to you from the pretty much the most exciting place I can imagine writing a blog: en route to Key West, Florida with four of my closest friends.  Pretty great, right?  Yeah.

So this is my first spring break that I haven’t returned home at all and it’s been a ton of fun so far.  A friend of mine lives here and she brought four of us home with her to spend time in the city, take a two-night excursion to Key West, an overnight to Ft. Lauderdale, and finally come back to Miami for more exploring and shopping and (hopefully) tanning.

our hotel in key west

It’s been a perfect way to recharge in the middle of the semester, which, by the way, has been quite an odd one so far.  With the snow week so early on, it was pretty tough to get into the swing of things, and by the time I realized midterms were coming up, I felt pretty far behind.  I had an insanely busy week and managed to make it through the exams and papers, with this beaming light at the end of the tunnel.

Better still? By the time we get back to Baltimore, it’ll be in the middle of turning into real spring weather, which is by far my favorite time of year.  It’ll definitely make it a little easier to go transition from Miami back to Baltimore when I know it’s sunny and warm.  Of course, this does feel like my last week of freedom, given I have an LSAT course awaiting my arrival (I’m actually missing a few lessons this week), and I have to start thinking about my finals and term papers.  But hey—I’m going to enjoy this beautiful sunny Florida while it lasts and take advantage of my first ever very-college spring break!

I’ll be sure to recap the trip once I return to Baltimore, but as of now, it’s hard to say what’s ahead of us!

UPDATE: We just got to our hotel in Key West and it’s going to be quite an experience…it has this lovely little courtyard thing below, but the downside is that all guests are supposed to be 25+, which was not the minimum age on the booking site we used.  Gotta love being threatened by management upon check-in!  And now, off to Duval Street for dinner and shopping!

I’m sitting here, early into Sunday afternoon, almost ready to get serious, but not quite.

You see, this weekend I decided to give myself my own fall break.  I’ve already mentioned that I don’t have classes on Friday, but this doesn’t automatically mean a three-day weekend.  Most Fridays I try to get up at the same time I do Monday-Thursday, have a bit of a leisurely breakfast, and then get to work.  But not this Friday.  I woke up late (does 10:00 count?) and somehow managed to do nothing productive with my day, at which point I decided I was on fall break.

My fall break coincided with fall fest and young alumni weekend, meaning there was a TON of stuff going on, with both on-campus events and off-campus parties. Of course, as any break should, mine included plenty of laziness.  I spent the majority of Saturday watching movies and re-watching Thursday’s episode of The Office (3 times, so far).  Aside from that, I saw a screening of The Hangover on the beach, and stopped by a couple of other events and parties as well.  The closing event of my fall break was a trip with friends to Pete’s Grill and The Book Thing this morning.  Pete’s Grill is an awesome place a few blocks away that’s garnered fame for being Michael Phelps’ favorite breakfast place, and this morning I understood why.  Delish.  And The Book Thing is Baltimore’s free book warehouse.  Walk in, browse, pick up anything that appeals to you, and leave.  It’s so great and a short walk from Pete’s Grill, making for a perfect morning.  I left today with six books on criminal law, American politics, interest groups, and the like.  My friends picked up entirely different things (of course) and it was kind of funny to look at what we all got and compare.

So I realized that sometimes, once in a while, on occasion, it’s okay to completely disregard real life and focus on having fun.  It’s good and perhaps even necessary for maintaining sanity.  And even Hopkins students do it!  Of course, now it’s time to buckle down, go back to being a normal person and do my biostats homework (I can’t even tell you how much I’m dreading all of that), but it was a fantastic break that hopefully prepared me to get back to reality.

First things first — if you’ve ever visited this blog before, you may notice that it has a new look.  It’s still the same old stuff, but I chose a different design to start off the new school year.  Let me know what you think!

And speaking of new, I’m writing this new blog from my new apartment!  I moved in exactly a week ago and have gotten completely unpacked, organized and settled since then.  It’s taken a lot of cleaning and furniture assembly to turn it into a my own little home, but now that it’s all taken care of, I really love the place.  I’m still working out little things here and there, but it’s wonderfully comfortable and relaxing.  I feel like it suits me quite well.

I ended up living by myself this year which was a little bit intimidating at first.  But after the first day, I already started to love waking up and just going about my new routine in my own place.  And as an added perk, I have friends living in the building, so I don’t feel completely isolated.   And in the interest of full disclosure, I’m living in between two dorms.  So I’m not exactly branching way out or anything.  It’s really my perfect situation to be living on my own.

Most of all, I’m excited to be back in Baltimore.  This past week was pretty quiet but my friends are just starting to get back and the campus is getting busier, which makes me even more anxious for things to pick back up again.  I’m looking forward to my classes this semester and learning more about my public health major (after all, I’ve only taken one class in the department!), as well as dabbling in political science a bit more.  I think it’ll be a good balance of challenging and engaging yet all interesting in different ways.

As for the next couple of weeks (up until classes start), I’ve got big plans:  learning to cook, doing some suggested pre-reading for my Constitutional Law class, and starting work in the Admissions Office.  And before long we’ll be welcoming a huuuge freshman class and getting immersed in all of the orientation events–I can’t wait.  It’s good to be back.

Just as many of the incoming freshmen are getting antsy and anxious about the upcoming weeks, I am too.  As a rising junior, you’d think I’d pretty much be a seasoned pro when it comes to moving back and forth from Baltimore, but the persistent butterflies in my stomach tell me that’s not the case.

I’m moving into my very first apartment in exactly ten days.

And it’s my own, too–I’ll be living completely by myself.  Yet, so far, I’ve packed just one box.  This is a drastic improvement though.  Because at this time yesterday, when I should’ve been packing, I was watching a movie while my pastry dough chilled.  In fact, I spent the entire day making a chocolate Danish braid when I should’ve been packing.  Before that, when I should’ve been packing, I went through my books from old classes to sell online.  And before that, when I should’ve been packing, I caught up on tv shows I’d heard so much about but never had the time to watch.

Apparently, one of my favorite coping mechanisms is avoidance.  I’m nervous about moving into my own apartment, so I don’t pack.  Instead I watch movies and bake ridiculous pastries.  Seems like an easy enough conclusion to come to.  Except for the fact that it’s absolutely STUPID.  Like it or not, ready or not, packed or not, in ten days’ time, I’ll be in that little apartment that’s going to be home for the rest of my undergraduate years.

I think that’s what’s getting me.  I’m about to move into something that I can make into a real home.  For the past two years, I lived in on-campus housing, which is certainly nice, but the 9-month contract, by it’s very nature, makes the residence a temporary situation.  It became a home away from  home, but it wasn’t a real home itself.   Comfortable, fun, and personalized, but still a dorm.

And now I’m moving into my own apartment–for the rest of my time as an undergrad (granted, it’s only a year and a half for me–but let’s not kill the drama).  I’m buying cookbooks and baking sheets and I’m going to have my own furniture.  In my own apartment.  This is so weird to me.

So, dear freshmen, if you’re reading this and feeling anxious, you’re certainly not alone.  All of your fellow freshmen are feeling it, and at least one overwhelmed upperclassman is, too.  My best advice would be to enjoy your time at home and NOT to avoid packing.  As for me, I think a trip to the grocery store might be in order–I’m all out of flour and yeast and thinking it’s about time to try making chocolate croissants.  (…and maybe I’ll pack another box tonight, but only if I can pretend I have more than ten days left before I have to start playing grown-up.  And clearly, based on this blog entry, I’m going to be SO great at that).  Bear with me, I’ll get there.

With just a couple days left of my summer internship and a rapidly-approaching return-to-Baltimore date, I’m quickly realizing that my time at home is coming to a close.  This, of course, means an insane amount of packing and organizing and shopping is to be done, but I don’t even want to think about that yet…how about I’ll just recap that process once I’ve moved into my apartment in mid-August?

For now, I’ll stick to an update on the past few weeks, seeing as my last post was just at the start of my internship.  I feel incredibly lucky to have found such an opportunity; it’s been so much more than I ever could’ve imagined.  Some days are more tedious than others with the various office tasks, but a couple of the attorneys have had pretty big trials in the past several weeks that we’ve been following.  It’s fascinating to watch stories unfold and a new twist reveal itself, and I’ve quickly learned that nothing is as clear as it will initially seem.   There’s always two (or more) sides to a story and an infinite number of potentially-complicating factors to throw into the mix, making “the truth” (as we think of it) not so much an objective matter but more of a question of what fits together the best, even if there are some holes and unanswered questions.  At least that’s the job of the jury, in these trials I followed; which version of ‘facts’ makes the most sense?

And certainly it’s not always a difficult decision to tell what makes sense.  In working with some attorneys who have been practicing longer than I’ve been alive, I’ve heard quite a few good stories about outrageous defense strategies that come out when all evidence clearly implicates their clients’ guilt, yet their job is to give it a shot anyway.

As for actual experiences I’ve had, aside from administrative tasks, we’ve conducted a few client interviews, shadowed an attorney for the day, visited jail for interviewing clients, toured the state prison (including death row), and spent lots of hours in court for first appearances, motions, pleas, trials, etc.  I’m now an expert copier and alphabetizer, have pretty well mastered the court computer systems, am getting a little better at reading people (and jurors) and have a pretty good idea of the tendencies of different judges.  All in all, pretty productive summer, yes?

Aside from the internship, I’ve just been spending time with my family, seeing a little bit of the lake, and doing a bit of reading that I never got around to during the school year.  I had surgery on my hand a few weeks back and I think it’s finally back to almost-not blue, depending on the way you look at it.

As for the next couple of weeks, I’ll be trying to figure out how to furnish a studio apartment, where to get said furniture, packing up and before I know it, moving back to Baltimore.  Whew.  Until next time…here’s hoping your August will start out much less busy than mine.